Ocado: the cheek!

Originally, this post’s title had the present participle of the F word neatly nestled in between the and cheek. I removed it for Francis’ benefit (NSFW), but I’m often torn in suchsituations. Now, having raised the very subject of sweary things, astrange urge has come over me to type the C word. Scunthorpe. That’lldo.

Back to the point. A few days ago, I was sent a lovelylittle email from our friends at Ocado, our online supermarket ofchoice, part of the John Lewis Partnership, don’t you know. (My wife practices the John Lewis religion, their Oxford Street store being termed The Mother Ship.)

Theyinformed me that they were introducing a "small delivery charge to someof [their] slots. Charges will affect busy periods but quieterdelivery slots will remain free.

"All customers spending over £75will have the opportunity to choose a free delivery slot at a quietertime of the week, otherwise the charge will be up to £4. If you spendless than £75 the charge will be no more than £6."

(I’d havepreferred a semicolon after week, but that’s beside the point.) I wasgrateful, almost eternally so, for the opportunity to choose a freedelivery slot at a quieter time of the week, although recall havingenjoyed that very opportunity before receiving the email. IndeedI’d had the opportunity to choose freedelivery slots at any time of the week, which was moreenjoyable still. Overall, I feel the Ocado’s elevated prices, theirlack of the need for a physical shop (for me at least), and the overallvalue of our shops (c. £135 spent on each delivery) should togethercontribute towards a strong argument to allow us free deliveryregardless.

Anyway, we chose 9–10pm this evening, the slotsbetween 7pm and 9pm being deemed to fall in a busy period. When theguy arrived at 8.50pm, I wondered whether a surcharge would be levied. (I think I’m safe in assuming it won’t. Though stranger things havehappened.)

Thinking again, given my annoyance at the very conceptof a delivery charge, I was sorely tempted to levy one to the deliverychap in return for hitting our busy period. (In reality, itwasn’t that busy, as bathtime was over and the little lady was tuckedup asleep. But that’s not the point.) Maybe I’ll write a letter toOcado detailing my proposed inconvenience charge.


2 Responses to “Ocado: the cheek!”

  1. Art Vandelay on June 26th, 2007 08:27

    I didn’t even get an e-mail.

    * feels unwanted *

  2. Steve on June 27th, 2007 00:40

    I’d switch to Lidl if I were you. They could deliver you the entire contents of one store for less than £135 (mind you – you’d be eating peculiar German ham and unpronounceable biscuits from now until Doomsday).

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